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Why LinkedIn is Like Dating

April 20, 20242 min read

If your LinkedIn messages are anything like mine, I get several messages a week (2 just this morning!) with long messages essentially saying, “here’s my stuff, click the link to buy it”.

I am sure these messages have plenty of information about how they will make my business soar or get me thousands of new connections and many other wonderful things to boost my business.


My response now is always “you need to buy me dinner first!”

As much as I appreciate the effort this person took to message me, they are offering a cookie-cutter solution for me when they know nothing about me or my business.

LinkedIn connections are like dating, get to know me. Ask questions. Wine and dine me first.

Everyone is on LinkedIn to network and grow their business or professionally network. Take it slowly. Ask questions, get to know the person and their unique business and its requirements.

We don’t jump into a marriage without knowing the person. OK, there are THOSE reality shows but that is not the norm. People do jump into business contracts from these messages, I am sure of it. For the most part, any social media, LinkedIn included, is about building relationships.

Here are five ideas that I would recommend for connecting on LinkedIn:

  1. Know your target market.
    For instance, if I am recruiting, I look for Engineers with a specific set of skills. If I am looking for clients for my coaching my target market is women 50+. Two very distinct markets but I know them both well.

  2. Get social.
    Interact with other people. Take time to read and comment on their posts. Engage!

  3. Edit your profile.
    Make sure you have a strong profile highlighting what you do.
    (When was the last time you updated your profile! 😊 )

  4. Build your own brand
    Stand out for what you do. Create posts that showcase what you do and how you provide a solution to their problems.

  5. Take it slow.
    LinkedIn is a long game. Connect, engage, be social!
    Treat your connections, the new ones especially, like you are dating. Take it slow and get to know them. Show them your worth!

Most importantly, be you! Be authentic!

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